Ian and Sue Wallace Counselling

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Talking families are happy families

Lets Talk

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Our Family Counsellor

Mary is our specialist Family counsellor and works from an Integrative and relational base using Psycho-dynamic/Systemic therapy approaches with Attachment/Narrative therapy.

Mary has a M.A. Relationship Therapy, BSc, PNLP She has practised as a Counsellor for over 14 years. Her areas of counselling Specialisms are: Relationships: Couples, families, and individuals. Stress. Emotional difficulties. Anxiety. Worrying. Depression/low mood. Bereavement/loss. Lesbian/Gay issues.
Her personal Approaches are: Integrative and relational. Psycho-dynamic/Systemic therapy approaches with Attachment/Narrative therapy. Solution Focused Brief Therapy/Coaching. Mindfulness in Counselling.
Mary is a member of BACP and a member of the British Psychological Society.

All our Counselling is totally confidential and will not be disclosed to others (unless there is a possibility the client would be a danger to themselves, others, domestic violence issues or that Children may be at risk. In this event then disclosure would be limited in the first instance to a Supervisor, a person who supervises the Counsellor, and then discussed with the client).

Payments for each counselling session with us are made prior to the session and can be taken from either debit or credit cards, if given advanced cancellation notice of 48 hours, prior to a session, the fee will be returned in full or transferred to another future session.

What is family Counselling?

Family counselling is used to encourage conversation between members of the family. Who is going to speak? What is blocking that? What do they want to talk about? It might clarify a new pattern of being together after a marital breakdown or remarriage. It can also help to process feelings of being excluded or rejected which might be otherwise acted out in disruptive behaviour; misunderstood by the other family members. Communication might be repaired or established for the first time. Members may feel supported and encouraged to manage changes with the help of impartial trained family counsellor.

A family counsellor maintains neutrality at all times to establish a platform free from blame and prejudice to allow members to explore the problem and then express their concerns for the family’s ability to change. Each family is unique, even within its own culture, and a non-judgemental view about the family’s beliefs and values; ethnicity, sexuality, religion, ability, age and class is essential to allow a new, better ‘system’ or set of rules to be formed.
This is done by collecting the views and thoughts through questions, mainly about the differences that exist among the individuals. Family members are then invited to be observers, too, of the questions answered by other members and of their own behaviours and assumptions. The trained family counsellor offers the group an opportunity to think and reflect on the present situation with a view to moving towards a better way of being together.

An assessment can be difficult due to the number of clients – defining where the problem is can mean something different to each member of the family. One person might be blamed and they in turn may blame someone else. If this issue gets stuck these two members might work together for a couple of sessions. Counselling can help establish the events that have led to the family needing help. These might include life events, transitions or repeating patterns. Family problems might be mapped out to show their history and development and allow members to feel clearer about the problems and how they might have arisen, reducing blame. There should also be an opportunity to define the relationships, as people see them themselves and as others do. This can lead to greater awareness and insight to allow any necessary changes. It can also offer the opportunity to see the abilities and difficulties that are available within the family group for dealing with problems and change and how they be might be used.

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